Today, March 8th, is International Women’s Day. This year, in an era of #TimesUp and #MeToo, it’s only fitting that the 2018 campaign theme is #PressforProgress. As the mom of two young girls, I can only hope that this progress will continue and they will grow up in a world that treats them equally.
In celebration of International Women’s Day, I wanted to honor the women who have inspired me the most in my life. Some I know very well, and some I’ve never met. Yet all have helped shape me into the woman I am today.
My mom. As the oldest of nine kids, my mom has always been a matriarchal figure. A former nurse and current badass real estate broker, my mom is also the life of the party as well as the one throwing it. She is also an incredible “Gaga” to my girls. I’m endlessly thankful to her for everything she has done for our family. She is the type of person who will come over to babysit, but will also bring over a fully catered dinner and even sneak in some weeding during nap time. She has worked hard her entire life, but also knows how to have the best time. She also makes a mean margarita. If there’s anything else you need to know about her, there’s this: in middle school, she and my dad took us out of school for a long weekend so that we could go see Jimmy Buffett in Las Vegas as a family.
Ann M. Martin. I grew up obsessively reading The Baby-Sitters Club and Baby-Sitters Little Sister books. They’re really the first chapter books I remember collecting and learning to read. I learned a lot about friendships, conflicts, divorced families, and work ethic from Ann M. Martin’s books. Looking back, she’s one of the only female authors I really remember reading before being exposed to other authors in school. She was my first favorite author.
Lucille Ball. I loved Lucy. But really, I loved her. Thanks to Nick at Nite, I was introduced to “I Love Lucy” at a fairly young age and became obsessed. I was too young to realize how much of a trailblazer Lucy was in the industry. In 1962, she was the first woman to run a major television studio. I dressed up as Lucy for Halloween in seventh grade. My favorite place to visit at Universal Studios was the “I Love Lucy” exhibit and store, where they also had a trivia game that I would ace. Growing up, she was a hilarious and beautiful woman to me. Learning how much of a strong female she was in an industry of men has made her even more legendary in my eyes.
Mrs. Clark. Mrs. Clark taught sixth and seventh grade English at Kingswood Middle School. Hers was the very first class I ever took when I started school at Cranbrook Kingswood. Mrs. Clark absolutely loved pigs, so she had posters of pigs all over her classroom, and stuffed pigs, too; when she got a black lab puppy, she named her Babe and brought her in to the classroom to visit from time to time. In sixth grade, the class was focused on grammar. I learned so much in that class. Mrs. Clark created something she called PunCap, where she gave us stories she had written about her childhood on worksheets without any punctuation or capitalization. It was our job to go through the stories and mark everything that needed to be punctuated and capitalized. I remember a story she told about buying an ice pick and trying to throw it like a dart, but instead she impaled her leg. What a woman! In seventh grade, she introduced us to one of my favorite books, To Kill a Mockingbird. Our summer reading for her seventh grade class was A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. It was the longest book I had ever read before then. Mrs. Clark was the most beloved teacher at Kingswood Middle School and with good reason. She made learning fun, and really set me on my path of loving the study of English and literature.
Diane Wakoski. Diane is a legend, not only as a poet, but as a professor at Michigan State University. I had an interest in writing poetry and knew that I would want to take her class, but I never realized how much I would learn. Diane’s class kicked my butt. I learned about clichés, and tropes, and how to craft a poem, and what was complete crap, and what worked. Her system of having students read their poems aloud to the class and then wait as she sorted them into a pile in order of best to worst was at times a triumph and other times a personal hell. But the thing is, she was usually right. And it made me a better writer. I still have her voice in my head as I’m writing something that is a clichéd sentence or thought. I truly think she prepared me for the rigors of grad school workshops and helped me grow a thicker skin. That’s something every writer needs.
Eve Ensler. In my senior year at Michigan State in 2007, I took a chance and tried out for “The Vagina Monologues.” My friends Marissa and Julia were directing it, and some of my classmates were also trying out. At the tryout, we had to read from a monologue of our choice, and also moan. MOAN. In front of our friends and strangers! It was that moment that I realized the power that comes from being vulnerable and trusting the people around me, especially a tribe of women. Eve’s incredible play was life changing for me. I learned about women’s empowering stories, tragic stories, hilarious stories, and heartbreaking stories. I learned that I could say vagina without blushing, because why should we be afraid of that word? Thanks to “The Vagina Monologues,” I made friends with a wonderful network of women that I keep in touch with to this day. In June 2012, five years later, women performed “The Vagina Monologues” on the steps of the Capitol building in Lansing as a response to female representatives being silenced on the House floor. Eve Ensler came to Lansing that day, and I had the opportunity to meet her briefly. She graciously pulled me in when I asked for a photo and gave me a big kiss on the cheek. Little did I know that I was actually pregnant with Stella at that very moment.
Stella and Margot. These little ladies inspire me every day to be an example for them, the way these other women were an example for me. I know that my words and my actions matter, and I realize the responsibility I have in raising them to become strong young women. I’m doing my best to embrace their interests, to encourage a love of science and music and films and books and yes, even the princess stuff. Just as I was typing this, Stella mooned me. These girls are helping me learn to take things a little less seriously, to go with the flow, and not try to control every moment. I know I’ll be learning so much from them as they are learning from me. I’m thankful for them.
Happy International Women’s Day! Who are the women who have inspired you the most?